There is no risk greater than refusing to risk at all

While in my masters of social work I took a HUGE risk: I left to travel.

I had just taken out the loan to pay for tuition. 2 weeks after I paid tuition (and it isn’t cheap!) the guy I was casually dating asked if I wanted to go to Australia with him. He was going for his masters for teaching.

Now, I feel it pertinent to add that I didn’t hop on a plane with a random guy I met at the bar the week before. We had gone to high school together and I knew him quite well.

But, it was still a risk to drop my life and move across the world!

But, that is what I did. I quite literally dropped everything and got on a plane.

I am STILL paying off my student loans 11 years later but it was worth every second. I left a piece of my heart in Australia. It was everything I could have expected and more.

Home
Dream come true.

Now, had I been afraid to take that risk I would never have had that experience. And, while one may argue that you don’t know what you don’t know, meaning I wouldn’t have known what I was missing, Australia had been on my vision board since I was 5 and my vision board was ripped out pieces of magazines and the board was my wall.

The point is this: When you are 90 in your rocking chair looking back at your life the biggest regrets will be the risks you DIDN’T TAKE. And I am not making things up. There has been actual research about this.

Bronnie Ware, an Australian nurse who spent several years working in palliative care caring for patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives, came forward with the top 5 regrets people had in the last 12 weeks of their life:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. Bonnie stated people realized how many dreams they left unfulfilled and how health, and “time”, had been taken for granted in their younger years.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. Bronnie says: “Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming.”

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realise until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.” Bronnie

Now, if that doesn’t light a fire in you I don’t know what will!

A lot of people think my mission in life is surrounding fitness. It isn’t.

My mission is to help YOU live life to the fullest. Enjoy each day. Live the healthiest you can. Be happier. Laugh more. Run the marathon you always wanted to run. Buy the horse you always wanted to buy. Move to the other side of the world on a whim because your heart is telling you to.

Fitness is just a tool I use, and a VERY powerful tool at that.

My tip to help you start taking control of your life?

Take your favourite complaint and turn that baby inside out!

For example: ” I can’t afford to buy that horse” becomes ” Money loves me so much it throws itself at me!”. Yes, corny, but powerful. I did this when I was finally tired of my old excuses on why I couldn’t afford a Blazing Colours baby. The point is NOT that you say this and then money rains down from the heavens as if some drug lords house blew up a kilometer down the road. Although, maybe that could happen!

No, the point is you start to search for the possibilities, the opportunities. You see the positive, not the lack of dollar signs in your account. You start to get into a success mindset and get ready to make shit happen. When I started this affirmation I started problem solving and applied to a ton of jobs! The one that allowed me to afford the baby hired me. And I was wildly unqualified!

Future eventer extraordinaire

Another negative to a positive? “I hate my job” becomes “I am grateful to my job for supporting me and for being my stepping stone on my way to awesome badassery and for teaching me so very much about patience and perseverance.” I think every entrepreneur can relate to this one! I use it daily as my business grows and it has completely transformed my life and how I approach each day.

The point is I want you to write down whatever crappy self limiting belief is holding you back then flip it. Post it around your house. Write it on your mirror with lipstick. Stick it to your dashboard. Make it the background of your phone. Bloody well needle point it into a pillow if you need to.

Then, say it every time you catch yourself about to launch into the same old boring complaint.

And here is the thing many people don’t tell you:

Transforming your life is uncomfortable.

Changing your mindset is hard. You must commit to being uncomfortable day after day. Befriend the unfamiliar, the risky, the “I don’t wanna” and do it anyway.

The discomfort means you are almost there.

xo

Ashley

Why a raccoon can teach you life lessons.

Today I was asked if I could be any wild animal which would I choose.

To many peoples surprise I picked a raccoon. You may be thinking “WHAT!? Of all the animals you choose a raccoon?!”

Yes. And you know why?

Raccoons are adaptive. Spent millions developing raccoon proof garbage bins? Give the raccoon a few hours to figure out how to outsmart the road block. Build a subdivision in her habitat? She will figure out how to use your structures to thrive.

There is no obstacle too great and no invention too advanced to outsmart the determined, persistent and intelligent raccoon.

Raccoons are like the toddlers and youth of the human world. A toddler falls COUNTLESS times learning to walk but they don’t throw up their arms and give up because there are too many obstacles in their path. They keep trying until victory is theirs.

When learning to speak toddlers and children don’t stop learning. They intently watch the world around them and soak up information like a sponge, learning words from their environment (whether ideal words or not).

Youth unapologetically pick up figure skating or gymnastics and fall to their knees. Over. And over. But they get back up and try again. As a youth I crashed to the ground on my skates, trying new complicated spins and jumps, more times than I can count.

But I kept going. I knew my goal and I forged forward without blinking an eye.

Be a raccoon. Find the inner child that NEVER GAVE UP.

As adults we seem to become so wrapped up in the opinions of others, and fear of failure, that we would rather be miserable than try to reach new goals and dreams.

“You want to dump $10,000 into starting a new business?!” you can just FEEL the judgemental comments from friends and family.

“You are trying a NEW diet?!” you can predict the harsh tones as you try one more time at reaching your weight loss goals.

“I knew she would fail”, wait, that one is coming from your inner mean girl BEFORE you even start!

Now, let me say this loud and clear for the people in the back:

WHO CARES.

First, people don’t care as much as your ego has led you to believe.

Second, others opinions of you and what you do are none of your business.

If you fail? News flash. Whatever your goal is you WILL fail. Over and over. Get over it now.

If Sally from Facebook doesn’t like what you are doing with your life? Who cares. It isn’t her life.

If you fall? Great, you will learn what does and doesn’t work, just like the young girl does trying a new jump on the balance beam.

Dream big.

Stop caring so much about failure and what others think….

And start caring more about the quality of your short life.

Stop caring what you inner mean girl says and get out there and

Start proving her WRONG.

A raccoon doesn’t apologize for out thinking the special garbage bin you bought in under an hour.

A child doesn’t apologize for trying 100 times to get their first step.

The 10 year old doesn’t care what you think when she falls off the balance beam after trying for the 20th time to land a new flip.

Friend, STOP APOLOGIZING. To yourself and others. Just go out there and start living.

Xo,

Ashley