Nay sayers & Negative Nancies

What others think of you has nothing to do with you and everything to do with them.

~ Jen Sincero

When I left my masters in Social Work to travel for a year I had more nay sayers than I had supporters. As a 20 something I had a lot more guts to go against the grain and do what my heart called me to do.

Luckily I listed to my heart because Australia was the best experience I could have ever hoped for. I traveled weekly, did solo trips into the mountains for weeks on end. Hiked mountains, swam in the ocean, cuddled Koala’s, saw a wild platypus (lifelong dream!), ran along the ocean, played, laughed and loved more than I ever thought possible. Australia filled me up with a special kind of magic that stays with me to this day.

Had I listened to the nay sayers I would have never experienced that.

As I grew older I lost that. I became more concerned about what other people thought and was easily swayed when someone had something negative to say about a new adventure I was undertaking. While I wouldn’t say it out loud I would decide that something wasn’t right for me out of FEAR of judgement.

Can you relate?

I want you to sit back for a moment and truly ask yourself how many opportunities you passed up out of FEAR. Out of fear that your friends would judge you. Out of fear how complete strangers on the internet would perceive you.

How many wonderful “Australia moments” could have come out of those missed opportunities?

I don’t ask you to do this to have you dwell on the past. I want you to realize that REGRET stings more than taking chances and putting yourself out there ever will.

Ask yourself:

Are you living an “ok” existence to avoid rocking the boat?

Are you living a “fine” existence to avoid ruffling feathers?

If so, why continue living a ho-hum existence when a totally BADASS, mind blowing existence is on the table?

Here is the thing. People’s opinions of you have more to do with them than they do with you. Someone that is unhappy, and resentful, will project their negative vibes on you. Instead of using that as a reason to drag your vibes down why not use it as a way to propel yourself forward and find people that align with your beliefs. Those people are out there. People that support you and WANT to lift you up are out there and just waiting to welcome you into their tribe!

Take stock of the things you have on auto-loop in your mind and upgrade anything that is not supporting you in your quest for a better life. Pay attention to what comes out of your mouth when you talk with your coworkers. Your friends. What type of podcasts do you listen to? What types of shows do you watch?

Pay attention to the thoughts that go through your mind as you look in the mirror. It is ok to want to better yourself but you must also love who you are now. Change always comes from a place of love. From positive vibes. You must love yourself enough to change and go after what you want. Conquer from within.

An easy exercise to change your reality TODAY?

Write down 5 beliefs/ complaints/ activities/ environments that are constant buzz kills in your life. Things that keep dragging you back down into the pits of despair and mediocrity. Immediately after writing those 5 things down write down the SPECIFIC ways you are going to immediately upgrade them.

Changing your thoughts, and environment takes work. A year ago I was medicated for anxiety, wallowing about how I “could never get my personal training business up and running again”, and I woke up every morning wondering how the HELL I was going to make it through another day. I literally burned through sick days due to anxiety and depression.

Snooze became my best friend and I would have literally allowed you to shave my head rather than decide to drag my lazy ass off the couch, and away from Netflix, to workout.

I binged Harvey’s milkshakes and deep fried pickles, and hid the evidence so my husband wouldn’t judge me. Then beat myself up over the rolls that were developing around my mid section. I was a far cry from the athlete I once was. And that only spurred me to emotional eat more.

Thank goodness I took a chance on a post about a coaching opportunity with the amazing company I am now aligned with. It literally gave me the power to save my life.

I am now off anxiety meds. I don’t drink the excessive amounts of wine I previously thought I deserved for stressful days. I rebuilt my self confidence and badass willpower to succeed. I have joined a wonderful team with the company I am aligned with and I have built a team of empowering, inspirational women and men. We literally change lives for a living, from home, and I couldn’t be more proud of what we have all overcome and accomplished.

So, next time an opportunity knocks, see it for what it is: The universe presenting you with a wonderful gift. Take a leap of faith. And, if negative Nancies try to bring you down, realize you may have to leave behind some people to grow into the wonderful, badass person you were meant to be.

You are a badass, my friend. Don’t ever forget that.



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